Dear Diary, I have been productive. I have been exercising and deciding things for the future. I have been action. I came to the conclusion, once again, that I work better when busy. I need to be busy and keep busy. So i can't think about the meaning of life and freak out again. Though I believe the meaning of live is enjoy yourself. But that may be because I am young. But thank god I am not too young. I saw some teenegers at the pool today. I don't want to be a teenager ever again.